Free to be free Of Me... Part 1

So the other night before going to bed, my husband and I talked about what it means to be free. And there are so many perspectives, as with most things. However, when we filter out the many variables, it becomes a little more clear. Hence, let's narrow down the question.

For a Christian, what does it mean to be "free"? I've struggled to understand this clearly for a while now. I've even made it the title of my blog spot. (Free free to be Me) And I wonder how much of it is being free to do whatever I want, and what does it mean to surrender my will to God? How can I be free, if I am surrendering my will? That's not freedom! Or is it?

And I yearn for that sense of just being myself without regrets or guilt. That I can be comfortable in my own skin. Yet, I struggle....

You see I've heard this message several times, and I just can't seem to get a grip on it. You will find freedom in doing God's will. When you begin to look outside yourself and settle your sight on God, you begin to free yourself enough that all you wish for is what God wishes for. And there is freedom in Him. The more you get to know who He is, the more you want to please Him. And when you please Him, you find freedom.

So we determined the difference between what we see as the freedom to do as we wish when we wish, and the sense of peace, conformity, and fulfillment when we are in Christ.

Later that night, I awoke at about 4:30 in the morning..... made a bathroom trip and went back to sleep. However, the first thought that came to mind when I awoke in the middle of the night was, "It's not 'free free to be me'. It's 'free to be free of me'". Obviously, I was still struggling with this in my subconscious.

And I pondered on these words for a while. So much so that I came to this conclusion. I am free when I am in complete peace about who I am and where I am knowing full well with all certainty that I am exactly who and where God wants me to be.

That comfort in my own skin that I long for, indeed, is found in being at peace with who I am in Christ. It isn't so much that I can do whatever I want because I'm free to do it, but that I can do all things through Him who strengthens me. That's freedom!

It isn't that so much that I am able to live a life with little regard for what others may think, as much as it is a to live a life where what matters most is how it brings glory to God. Indeed, when I am living and doing what pleases and brings glory to God, then I am free!

And I am no longer tied down by the opinions of others because what matters most is God's view of me. And I am no longer worried about how I look before men, and how I'm aging, and what will my friends think?.... I am free to be me because He loves me. And I am free to be free of me because of the price He paid for me.